


Slow Dancing In The Dark

by lovestruc



Series: ♡ kai's chanhee-centric rambles ! ♡ [2]
Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Developing Relationship, Fluffy Ending, Hesitant Chanhee, Light Angst, M/M, Past Relationship(s), it's kinda vague tho
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-17
Updated: 2020-08-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 06:00:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25948483
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovestruc/pseuds/lovestruc
Summary: Now, Youngkyun doesn't quite know where they stand with each other.Sure, he has an idea, but it's hazy and unclear. He knows that something's there, but he doesn't know if Chanhee wants there to be something there. From their fight earlier, Youngkyun could tell that Chanhee was conflicted. Something held Chanhee back from saying that he didn't want a relationship, but Youngkyun didn't know what it was.They were going in circles, always avoiding this when they were together. Now that Youngkyun brought it up, they stopped. But they both knew that they would go right back to circles after they make up.Youngkyun sighed and closed his eyes, taking a breath before turning away and going back inside.
Relationships: Kang Chanhee | Chani/Kim Youngkyun | Hwiyoung
Series: ♡ kai's chanhee-centric rambles ! ♡ [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1923232
Kudos: 18





	Slow Dancing In The Dark

**Author's Note:**

> this is based off of slow dancing in the dark by joji, go listen to it if you haven't, it's a good song.
> 
> chanhee is mentioned to have a past relationship with someone, and you can decide who that someone is because i didn't really know who to put it as.

Youngkyun stood on one of the balconies of a house he knew he didn't belong in. He stared at the painted metal railing, counting the exposed bits of iron where the paint had chipped away. He looked back into the room the balcony extended from, seeing Chanhee laying on the bed, back turned to him. Youngkyun sighed, looking away from the other and turning his eyes to the stars.

He just wanted to know if Chanhee felt the same as he did. 

He knew that Chanhee didn't want a relationship, he didn't want the possibility of what happened before to happen again. But Youngkyun thought that maybe, he had changed his view on relationships and moved on from him.

But as usual, he was wrong. 

Now, Youngkyun doesn't quite know where they stand with each other. 

Sure, he has an idea, but it's hazy and unclear. He knows that something's there, but he doesn't know if Chanhee wants there to be something there. From their fight earlier, Youngkyun could tell that Chanhee was conflicted. Something held Chanhee back from saying that he didn't want a relationship, but Youngkyun didn't know what it was.

They were going in circles, always avoiding this when they were together. Now that Youngkyun brought it up, they stopped. But they both knew that they would go right back to circles after they make up.

Youngkyun sighed and closed his eyes, taking a breath before turning away and going back inside.

"Chanhee."

He saw Chanhee flinch, before looking back at him, the recognizable fear in his eyes. 

"I'm not him."

"I know." Chanhee spat back, turning away from Youngkyun again.

Another sigh left Youngkyun's mouth, as he sat down on the edge of the bed.

"I don't know what you want, Chanhee."

"I don't know either. I just want to stop remembering him."

"Do I remind you of him that much?"

Chanhee propped himself up onto his elbows, staring into Youngkyun's eyes even if the room was dark, moonlight from the open balcony doors being the only light source. 

He stared into the pools of coffee that looked back at him, taking a deep breath before answering.

"Yes."

Youngkyun stood, going back out to the balcony.

"Wait, Youngkyun."

Chanhee got up from the bed, throwing the comforter aside and walking out to the balcony, standing behind Youngkyun.

"What am I doing wrong?"

Youngkyun choked out, staring up at the moon. 

Chanhee went and stood next to him, holding onto the railing of the balcony, paint chipping away under his fingertips.

"I don't know."

They stayed like that for a while, staring up at the night sky. Youngkyun observed the moon, as Chanhee tried to find constellations among the many stars in the sky.

Chanhee remembered what the pattern of the stars was the first night him and Youngkyun started this dance with each other. He remembered that Orion was in the sky.

It was his favorite constellation for that reason. 

"Look, I know why you're so hesitant to let me in, Chanhee. But he's gone now, I know that you want to get over him. If you're not ready, I just want to know."

Youngkyun finally spoke, breaking the silence between them. He gazed down at Chanhee, seeing the younger close his eyes before speaking. 

"I don't know if I am yet. But I want to let you in, I want us to be more. I'm just... worried."

"You don't need to be, you know that I feel the same. I'm not him, I just want you to under stand that."

"I do understand that. I just can't help but see him in you, because I care about you the same way I cared about him, maybe even more."

"You're scared of feeling like this, aren't you?"

"Yeah. I can't help it, because I want what you want, but I don't want this chance of something going wrong."

Youngkyun reached down and grabbed Chanhee's hand, resting the sides of their hands on the metal railing. 

"I'll make sure nothing does. As soon as you're ready, I want you to try embracing this feeling and this whole thing we have."

Chanhee nodded, turning to face Youngkyun as he did the same. 

"What do we have?"

Chanhee softly spoke the words as he stared up into Youngkyun's eyes, watching as the older's eyes darted down to his lips, Chanhee's doing the same to Youngkyun's.

"Whatever you want us to have."

And with that, the two leaned into each other and pressed their lips together, Chanhee's hands finding their place around the back of Youngkyun's neck and Youngkyun's hands being placed firmly on Chanhee's hips.

They both knew that this kiss would change things, but both of them were ready for that change. 

After going in circles for so long, they finally came to a standstill. 

They parted from the kiss, their eyes locked onto each other's. 

"When you're ready, tell me. I just want to make sure I won't hurt you like he did."

Youngkyun turned to leave, only for Chanhee to grab his wrist and pull him back to the balcony.

"Stay with me, for tonight. We won't do anything, I just want to try this." 

Youngkyun nodded, taking Chanhee's hand and letting the younger lead him back into the bedroom. 

The two laid down on the mattress, Youngkyun grabbing the thrown comforter and pulling it over the both of them. 

They laid there for a while, just listening to each other's soft breathing and the sound of cars passing on a road far from Chanhee's balcony and open windows. 

Youngkyun tentatively took Chanhee's hand in his, being careful with what he did. Chanhee held Youngkyun's hand back, his thumb rubbing the back of Youngkyun's hand slowly. 

Slowly, Chanhee moved closer to Youngkyun, finding comfort in being close to him, in sharing a bed like this. He rested his head on Youngkyun's shoulder, his arms slowly wrapping around him.

He might have flinched when he felt Youngkyun's arms wrap around him, but he reminded himself that it was Youngkyun. And he trusted Youngkyun, he cared about him.

Youngkyun felt it when Chanhee flinched, but didn't say anything, because he knew that Chanhee wanted to make sure he was ready on his own. And Youngkyun knew that would take a while for him to admit that he was ready. But Youngkyun didn't mind it, because he just wanted to be with Chanhee, even if it took a thousand years or eternity for the other to admit that he was truly ready.

Because he knew that he would care for Chanhee for many more eternities after that.


End file.
